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Wednesday, 30 December 2009

Ian Rushton - A Year in Bad Boys - 2009.

No I am not going through the whole year repeating things and events but I thought I might try and record a few reactions to a year’s darts in the hut.

I will try not to dwell on things that we all know, for example that Steve seldom turns up and that Papas rebounds have only drawn blood once so far but we are all terrified by the noise they make as they bounce off the board whilst we are walking away. Similarly the regular, but temporary, loss of Jelly Arm as he leaves the building to receive the talking to that he gives himself, and the occasional Redbond cry of ‘YeeeeeessssS’ as he hits a treble and explains to us all how he was going for it. How we all miss the machine gun like clatter of Casablanca’s darts hitting the floor as he vents his frustration with his own play. And we all know the severe stare of our host if one is judged to be straying into the area of behaviour classified as barracking. I certainly know the feeling one gets when ones attire for the evening draws a critique from Peter, and collects labels such as Val Doonican and Captain Birdseye.

One shouldn’t be hurt by the injustice of the label Moth Man for removing a moth from this life when it was in an area of the hut which could easily have caused a distraction to other occupants. After all the venue has an insectocutor running virtually all the time which destroys anything which is careless enough to stray into it. I often wonder what might be the outcome if one of Papas darts ventured in that direction.

Of course these are things that Peter includes in his regular weekly reports so I will not cover them here.

I feel that I should not spend time and words reflecting on my own performance at darts, after all Peter produces very good statistics week by week. This means that anyone who is interested would know that my %age of wins in 2007 was 57.4 and after playing virtually every week throughout 2008 I delivered 49.83%! Here I am after another full year of darts which has resulted in a much deserved improvement to 50.16%. I would of course resist any temptation I might feel to blame the many people that have partnered me in 2009. Anyway, as I said, one shouldn’t just go through a year’s darts looking at ones own results.

So, that is quite a lot of material being ruled inadmissible for this purpose and means that I need to look elsewhere for the content of this missive.

So perhaps I need a more general look at the years play? Things have certainly moved on. We regularly play 7 or 8 games in a 2 hour session and occasionally even 9, and therefore it is a worthwhile outing. It is always good to catch up with whatever is happening in our various lives, but there is seldom a need for any deeply serious conversation. Regardless of who partners who, the perceived abilities of the various individuals, it is seldom possible to predict the result of the evenings play, or for that matter a single game. The outcome is never really certain until it is over. They are all very competitive games, exciting on very many occasions, so that you can feel the tension in the hut and enjoy the highly charged atmosphere.

A Shang Hai is always worthy of note, some trebles can justify praise, double trebles usually come in for analysis, treble trebles are obviously very memorable but sadly I can’t remember one, even just a good close grouping of darts, especially if in a number under 10, and thrown by your opponents are praised extensively. Sometimes some unusual tactics will cause some debate and discussion. Of course, operating in the somewhat confined space of the hut a team cannot have a private discussion on tactics so inevitably the opposition join in and can even influence the outcome!

As a result one can face with confidence the fact that if you say to Papa ‘Some 18s would be good’ and he throws his darts at 17, you know that all is in fact well with the world.

When I get home and am asked the inevitable question ‘What did you talk about?’ I am able to say ‘Nothing’. In my view this is incontrovertible evidence of time well spent.

Roll on next season.


2009 Attendance.

Above is a chart of the attendance figures for the year, out of a possible 48 fixtures. As you can see we have a wide range of attendance from the ultra keen (Pete, Ian and CM) through to the lower attendees (Mr Average, Steve and Malc).

As you might know, yearend scores are only ‘official’ if you make 12 matches per year, a feat truly mastered by JA (otherwise known as Mr Average). Steve and Malc’s figures are therefore unofficial.

Malc only managed 2 matches this year and has therefore been thrown out of bad boys; had his darts broken over his knees; been stripped of all badges and insignia.

Only kidding... But as Malc is now permanently resident in Oxford, his chances of increasing attendance are slim and he has asked me to remove him from the roster for next year. Malc I would like to say on behalf of all the bad boys what a pleasure it was to play with you and better still against you! Love from us all.

Steve has no such excuse and says he wants to play again next year! Right then everybody hold your collective breath.....

Peter x

Darts – The last match of the season!

The final lap of this year’s darts grand prix has been finished, the chequered flag waved and the results are in!

The last match took place on Tuesday 22nd December. I don’t intend to delve deeply in to the nuts and bolts, just give the result really! Teams were Ian and Doddy ‘v’ Pete, Casablanca and Dave.

We all had a lot of fun but although the laughs were shared the scores weren’t. The final score line was: PCMD 1234567 / W ID. So a 7 – 0 victory to PCMD

Bull Wars: Doddy 2, Ian 1, Peter 1, Dave 1 making Doddmeister the bullmeister.

Chart Changes: Well I said there could be changes right up to the last minute and how right I was! Due to Ian’s loss on the evening Papa bubbles up one place past Rushers to 3rd position. Dave, due to his win zooms two places up the leader board to 5th place!

The Final Rankings for the year are:

Peter 58.12%
CM 54.65%
Papa 50.94%
Ian 50.16%
Dave 47.32%
John 46.67%
Mike D 44.71%
Doddy 35.92%
Steve 34.78% (unofficial)
Malc 14.29% (unofficial)

I hope you all enjoyed the year and I look forward to the next one.

All that remains now is for me to present this years winner’s trophy to myself...

And... Hope one of you lot win it next year!


Peter x

Tuesday, 15 December 2009

Darts – T minus 1

Hi folks, we are almost at the end of the season, there is only one more match before the Bad Boys year end. Enough of next week, what happened this week I hear you ask?

This evening’s musketeers were: Pete, Ian, Mike-D and CM. After a couple or so flips the teams were decided as Jelly Arm and Rushers ‘v’ Pete and Casablanca Mike.

We set of on the first game in a very ragged fashion with all players looking like they needed to warm up, except Jelly Arm who decided he needed to cool down and immediately took himself out in to the frozen waste to give himself a good talking to. CM gave JA a good talking to as well because he left the hut door open on the way, boy was it cold out there!

Despite the poor start team PCM managed to bag the first game and then suffered a defeat in game two. We then had a good run from three to six, lost the seventh and took the eighth.

This leaves us with a score line of PCM 134568 / IJA 17 being a 6 – 2 victory to Casablanca and Pete.

I must point out that the score line in no way reflects the darts played for the evening; with the exception of two matches (one won by each team) that had considerable leads the others were all fairly close with the lead changing hands once or more in each game; exciting stuff.

I would go as far as to say a lot of the games were won or lost on tactics, often when one team made a decision to move on to open another number or not to chase the opposition they paid with blood. Two examples spring to mind Ian and JA left the 18s open in one game and CM and I managed to get a treble each along with some singles, stealing that game. In another CM and I were slow on the uptake with 17s and Jelly Arm had a field day scoring two treble 17s in a turn. Rushers was doing the similar on other numbers racking up shanghais and the like.

Notable Events:

In addition to the above JA managed a double semi and it was very nearly a triple, prompting him to enquire about certificates!

Lots of good darts played by all (along with some duffers of course); all things considered JA was MOTM for upping his game for the evening.

Bull Wars: JA 2, Ian 1, Pete 1, CM 1. Making JA the bullmeister for the evening.

Chart Changes: Only one change, JA drops below John.

One more to go, a full house at the moment then a break for Xmas week. Time to start consulting your diaries for January dates if you are keen to get booked in ASAP.

Game On!

Wednesday, 9 December 2009

Darts - It must be nearly Xmas!

Even torrential rain can’t dampen the spirits of a hut full of Bad Boys!

It was a prompt start (for most of us), but actually getting going took a little longer than normal due to an unusual ‘flipping’ arrangement.

There were six of us to play and the first flip produced a two - four which meant the remaining four flippers had to get a one – three result; not an easy task as the statistically minded amongst you can imagine, it took the best part of a further dozen flips; but finally the teams were decided as:

Peter, Ian and Papa ‘v’ Dave, Doddy and Casablanca Mike. We only managed 6 games, but what a six games! Now I think some folks will argue about this but to me they all felt close even if the final scores didn’t reflect it, you never knew if you were safe until the winning darts was in the board. In any event they were all good fun and the final tally was: PIP 1356 / 24 DDCM a 4 - 2 victory to Peter, Ian and Papa.

As you can see the result is only one game away from a draw so no disgrace to the losing side!

Notable Events:

Far too many to remember both good and bad. Some highlights that did lodge in the brain were Rushsers having a bull semi combo, two or three folks having double semis.

Several shouts of ‘Bugger me that’s nine darts without a score’.

Pete scoring a double treble nineteen.

Lots of trebles, lots of rubbish turns. However through it all Casablanca Mike was probably the most consistent player of the evening and for that reason alone (being a pearl amongst swine) he deserves to be MOTM.

Unusually, some vicious barracking took place, apparently (cough) I was involved in cheering when CM failed to get a score, doesn’t sound like me I know, but seemingly it happened along with guff from other players.

Bull Wars: Slim pickings tonight: Peter 2, Ian 1, CM 1. Making Pedros the minimalist bullmeister of the week.

Chart Changes: Not a sausage, however there is a definite scrap on for second place! The gap between Ian and Casablanca Mike closed by about 0.7% this week, leaving the gap at 0.62% which means a similar result next week could see Ian and Mike swap places... Will Jelly Arm be able to maintain his 0.08% lead over John?

Game On!

Peter x

Tuesday, 1 December 2009

Darts – I can read you know!

A cold and wet Tuesday evening, what better way to cheer yourself up than some serious dart action in the bad boys hut!

The hut had been rather cold when I opened it for the evening, only 4°C, thankfully a quick blast of the halogen heater had the room up to a bearable 12°C when we got started.

Dave was unable to play as he had sustained an infection / injury to his ear caused by either an eight ball off a cushion or the insertion of a cue in his lug-hole, in any event Dave decided to blame the whole thing on his ‘pool’ man, bloody unfair if you ask me. This left Pete, Ian and CM to slug it out. After a single flip of the flipometers the teams were decided as CM ‘v’ Pete and Ian.

We launched in to an eight game extravaganza. Mike steamed comfortably through the first three games, particularly the first one where Ian and I were massacred. Thankfully we then took a couple and a little more ping ponging until we had a final score line of CM 1236 / 4578 PI

In the early games Casablanca was thumping every available treble, building score and typically getting a pair of semi’s in his first turn at the centre. Thankfully Pete and Ian’s lacklustre performance started to pick up as the evening went on and of course CM was throwing twice as many darts as us, so he began to tire allowing the opposition to cash in on scores!

Notable Events:

Mike had a stunning amount of trebles and regular double semis.

Mike scored 7 x 19 ‘Nice’.

All players had double semi turns.

It was agreed we were all able to see what was on the scoreboard.

Bull Wars: CM 2. Peter 1, Ian 1. This makes CM the evening’s bullmeister and I suspect MOTM.

Chart Changes: None All players % went down slightly!

There may still be room for change with another three fixtures before the end of the season. I am particularly interested to see what happens at Jelly Arm’s next appearance as he and John are still only a gnat’s cock apart.

Game On!

Peter x

Wednesday, 25 November 2009

Darts - Peds and Rushers go head to head!

Due to circumstances beyond everyone’s control we ended up with just two players in the hut on Tuesday night, but Pete and Ted were fearless and decided to press on with a full scoring Bad Boys event.

No need for the flipometers this evening two teams, two players, even Jelly Brain could have organised us!

I managed to get a bull on the ‘Middle for Diddle’ which seems to have been an indicator of how the first game would go! I tanked through the game with trebles galore racking up plenty of score along the way. If I sound excited, well I am I played that first game like an unstoppable darts machine!

I managed to take the next two games (not as convincingly it has to be said) and then the inevitable happened, the Mothman took the fourth game. Back to me for the fifth and sixth then Rushers took the seventh and we ping ponged on the eighth and ninth.

Which compresses down to a score line of Peter 123568 / 479 Ian. A 6 – 3 win to the pedmeister.

Five of the games were close and went to the wire causing quite a lot of excitement, gnashing of teeth etc. So a fun evening despite only being a gruesome twosome.

Notable Events:

Both players had some excellent treble and bull / semi action, forcing each other to often change tactics.

Pete had two ‘belting’ games where it was hard to put a dart in the wrong place.

Nine games were played, only the third time this year.

Bull Wars: Peter 4, Ian 2. Peter was therefore the bullmeister for the evening.

Chart Changes: None just some minor % changes.

December here we come....

Game On!

Peds x

Wednesday, 11 November 2009

Darts – Time for the club to change its name?

Greeting Bad Boys and Bad Boys Followers. I am considering whether or not we need to change the club name. As you probably know the B.A.D. in BAD BOYS CLUB stands for Beer And Darts, well after last night there is a good bloody chance that I might make it stand for ‘Beer, Alzheimer, Darts’!

First off Jelly Arm (or perhaps that should be jelly brain) throws the first darts of the evening; hitting a one, twenty and a five, wanders up to the scoreboard and chalks up zero crosses but a score of 275! It seems that the poor fellow hasn’t noticed over the last couple of years that we have never ever played a single round of 301! It has always been (and always will be) Mickey Mouse.

Following this Val Doonican swore blind that CM had been here at the start of the evening despite the fact he was given a good ribbing for arriving a little late. JB also decided that the dart board he has been playing on since the first week of July had been acquired since his last visit.

Thankfully after these incidents things returned pretty much to normal so I will hold off on the name change for the moment.

The teams as flipped were Dave, Papa, CM ‘v’ Peter, Ian, JA.

DPCM whipped ahead in the first game scoring a substantial win. They looked to be doing the same in the second as well although PIJA started to close gap and eventually moved marginally ahead on score. We had an extraordinary finish to game two. PIJA required three semis to win and DPCM four, Papa stepped up to the oche and whacked in a bull and semi, it looked like they had the game in the bag. Fortunately Ian was next to the oche and he had other ideas, pumping a bull and semi in to win the game. One side roared with delight, the other looked gutted!

Following this a very fired up CM started game three with a hat full of twenties and his team went on to take the game, the opposition took the next two games and then they won the final leg. This made the final score line DPCM 136 / 245 PIJA – a draw!

Notable events:

Apart from those already listed there were a few good scoring turns.

Dave was back in the hut! Nice to see you back at the oche again Dave.

Bull Wars: Papa 2, CM 2, Peter 1, Ian 1.

Chart Changes: As it was a draw everyone moves a little closer to the 50% mark, causing JA to just overtake John in the process!


Peter x

Wednesday, 4 November 2009

Darts – It’s never over until you hear the fat lady singing.

Sadly Dave missed his advertised return match due to a disgusting cold (but he will be playing next week!). This meant the players for the evening were Peter, Casablanca Mike, Rushers and Doddy.

What an exciting evening it was! After a couple of flips the teams panned out as Pete and Ian ‘v’ Doddy and CM. We launched straight in to the games and immediately Pete and Ian seemed to be doing rather well with trebles galore.

We had a winning streak that lasted half way through the evening, for a minute or two I thought this was the way it would continue for the rest of the night, but as is quite often the case in the hut (and as predicted by Doddy to a despondent CM) it would be ‘a game of two halves’, and it was!

The next four games all went to the two Mikes giving us a final score line of: PI 1234 / 5678 DCM.

Notable Events:

In the first few games it was noted that Pete and Ian couldn’t be bothered with single numbers, preferring trebles on most occasions. The same could be said of the opposition in the later games.

There were some excellent ‘replies’ on a number of occasions as all hopes of a score on a quickly opened number were dashed by the opposition with a single dart.

Peter managed a scoring double treble (16s I think) putting them nicely back in a game they were losing.

A lot of bulls and semis were produced by all involved.

Ian and Pete nearly stole game 7 on bulls and semis, being 200+ they decided to go for the middle and collateral and it almost paid off with a swift succession of semis, bulls and bull-semi turns. Casablanca sealed the game with a bull. We all agreed it was incredibly close and one of the tensest games we had played for a long time.

Doddy and Pete had some stonking runs of darts and I have accordingly awarded them joint MOTM.

Bull Wars: Peter 3, Ian 3, CM 3, Doddy 2.

Chart Changes: None! We all go down a little bit except Doddy who gains the best part of 1%.

What will happen next week?

Game On!

Peds x

Wednesday, 28 October 2009

Darts – Val Doonican in da hut!

Attending were Pete, CM, John, Ian and Papa (missing, Steve, surprise surprise).

A quick flip set the teams as Casablanca Mike, John boy and Papa against the old crew members Pete and Ian.

Ian set the tone for the evening by bagging himself a bully during the ‘middle for diddle’. We then moved on to take the first game, lost the second and had a good run until the eighth which went to CM and company. This resulted in a final score line of PI 134567 /28 CMJP a 6 – 2 victory to Pete and Ian.

Notable Events:

The aforementioned MFD!

The evening was unusual in that for 75% of the games Ian and Pete were playing catch-up on some great starts and high scores by the other team. As the score line shows though we managed to steal those thanks mainly to good bull work. It has to be said the losing side were not overly hot on the centre allowing us to take the lead!

Mushers was doing a stunning Val Doonican impersonation with a cardigan previously owned by the man himself.

Val, for my money was Man (and cardigan) Of The Match.

Bull Wars: Peter and Ian 3 each.

Chart changes: None but it is now a close thing between CM and Ian, another half decent result for Ian will put him back in second place.

Next week Dave is back in the hut!

Game On!

Peter x

Wednesday, 21 October 2009

Darts – Bad Boys enjoy ‘Threesome’ Shock Horror!

What can I say? I know it sounds like a Sun headline but it is true. Three Bad boys were up in the hut raring to go. Pete, Ian and Doddy had a quick toss to decide who was going to play with who, it ended up that Pete and Doddy were going to team up on Ian and see if we could thrust our points where they matter the most.

Pete and Doddy were first to be on top but then Ian slid up from behind showing a massive lead in the second game. Doddy and Pete then had a bit of double win action taking the third and fourth games. We were getting quiet excited then Rushers licked us in the fifth, sixth and seventh. We played an eighth game but no one came first as it was a complete draw - 303 all. The final score line was: PD 134X / 2567X I, making a 4 – 3 victory to Ian.

Right, that should get our porn rating back up!

Notable events:

In my humble opinion I think all players had plenty of hot patches, generally the night’s darts were of a high standard. Doddy punched above his weight for the evening and is MOTM.

There were several ‘double trebles’ thrown and virtually all were scoring. This meant that the lead was often changing hands in our games, bloody exciting stuff.

Plenty of bull and semi action from everyone, no waiting around ages for a game to finish.

Rushers actually managed to finish the final game with a double bull. This was a very important throw and not only did it mean that game was a draw but it also stopped the whole evening’s competition being a draw and snuck Ian a victory.

Bull Wars: Ian 5, Peter 2, Doddy 2. Moth-man is the bull-meister for the evening.

Chart changes: Ian’s win bagged him a 0.15% increase, tiny – but enough for him to grab a 0.02% lead over Papa! Ian moves up to third place.

No doubt these guys will be vying for position again next week.

Game On!

Peter x

Tuesday, 13 October 2009

Darts – The Charts are like Musical Chairs!

Tonight’s bad boys, Peter, Mike, Ian, Papa and JA. Steve was a no show (Bad Bad Boy – Steve!)

A little flipping produced teams of Pete, Ian and JA ‘v’ CM and Papa.

It all started off rather gentlemanly with CM and Papa Taking the odd numbered games and the opposition taking the even numbers. Then Papa and CM decided to stop playing ball and play darts, this resulted in them grabbing the final two games, otherwise known as a 5 - 2 victory.

The final score Line: CMP 13567 / 24 PIJA.

Notable Events: Ian and Peter played badly for most of the night; Jelly Arm was our best man for the evening. Sorry we weren’t more support Mike!

CM had a bull semi finish, Pete had a Double Semi, Papa, Ian and Mike had some serious scoring triples at various points in the evening.

Pete played a disgusting ‘sneeze’ prank that had us laughing quite a lot.

Bull Wars: CM 2, Papa 2, Ian 1. = No Bullmeister for the night.

Chart Changes: Mike-D and John swap positions again! Seems like a ‘Strictly’ dance is going on between those two. Papa’s second 5 -2 victory in a row sees him go up to third place, pushing Mothman down to fourth position.

There is only 0.13% between Papa and Ian third place will be hotly contested over the next few weeks. CM is still in with a shot at first place if he can get a few more weeks on the winning side.

So, Game On!

Peter x.

Tuesday, 6 October 2009

Darts – A Short Report!

I am going to keep it short and sweet this week. I could make it longer but it would cause unnecessary pain to a couple of Bad Boys.

Attending: Peter, Papa (thanks for playing an extra fixture), Doddy and Ian.

Two flips and the teams were: Peter and Papa ‘v’ Ian and the Doddmeister. We managed to get through seven games with the score line PP 12347 / 56 ID, making a 5 – 2 victory to Pete and Papa.

Notable events: there were quite a lot of trebles, some double semis and a few bulls but nothing really unusual.

Probably more notable were the patches of bad play! Generally it has to be said that P&P played better than the opposition who were not at all happy with their performance for the evening!

Bullwars: Doddy 2, Papa 2, Peter 2, Ian 1. So no Bullmeister for the evening.

Chart Changes: None, a few dips and rises Papa being the main beneficiary for the evening with 1.16% gain. Can he do the same again next week?

Game On!


Tuesday, 29 September 2009

Darts – Jelly Arm Firms Up!

The Bad Boys on the starting blocks this evening were: Peter, Ian, Papa and Mike-D (AKA JA).

A couple of flips sorted the teams as Pete and JA ‘v’ Ian and Papa. We launched in to eight quick fire games that were very hard fought making a tough and exciting evening’s darts.

The final score line was PJA 15678 / IPAPA 234 almost making a classic Bad Boys game of two halves.

All the players had good and bad patches. When they were bad they were very very bad and when they were good they were excellent! I would have to single out JA for starting off a bit rubbery armed in the first game but from then on firming up nicely until he might need renaming ‘Rock Arm’ for my money he was MOTM.

Notable Events:

All players had double semis.

Papa had a bull semi

Ian had a double bull (Once again the treble bull evades us, but it will happen and Rushers could well be the man to do it).

JA had a double treble (scoring).

Papa had a double treble with a single on 17’s (scoring).

And there were some Shanghai’s floating around as well.

Bull Wars: Ian 3, Papa 2, JA 1, Peter 0. Making Ian Bullmeister for the evening.

Chart Changes:

Only one change, JA move up from sixth place to fifth, displacing John. Pete’s % moves up a miniscule 0.17%, Ian drops a shade over half a %, Papa drops a shade over 0.8%. Rock arm takes a whopping 2.01% increase!

At the end of three quarters of the season played things are shaping up as follows:

Peter appears to have quite a decent lead and is going to have to take a good hammering to be dislodged from the top spot over the twelve remaining fixtures (This is still possible in my humble opinion). Ian and CM are going to duke it out for second and third place.

There is hot competition midfield between Papa, Mike-D and John. Dave will be making a re-appearance in early November and could set the cat amongst the pigeons as due to a relatively low attendance record this year a couple of wins under his belt would catapult his % upwards!

The same is true for Steve, who is still within striking distance of Doddy. So as usual it is GAME ON!

Peds x

Wednesday, 23 September 2009

Darts – When the going gets tough...

Tonight’s Bad Boys were Peter, Casablanca Mike, Teddy and Doddy.

After a little practice we had a prompt start and set about the games with vengeance.

Ian and I took the first two games, The Mikes bagged the second two. After this there was some frantic ping-ponging, the dust finally settled to reveal a 5 – 3 victory to Ian and Peds. Score Line: PI 12578 / 346 CMD.

Most games were close with one side or another tending to get a good head start and then quite often having the lead stolen in the later stages of the game. Great games though, tough opponents and very exciting / nerve racking to play!

Notable Events:

Teddy had a bull semi finish.

Everyone had at least one scoring Shanghai, although for some reason certain players were referring to it as a ‘Shag-me’.

The losing team romped the bull count.

Bull Wars: CM 3, Doddy 3, Ian 1, Peter 0.

Chart Changes:

None! Pete and Ian’s %s went up a smidgen 0.18% & 0.34% respectively. Amazingly Doddy’s % went up by the smallest amount we normally register 0.01%! CM was the only casualty dropping by modest 0.69%.

There is still plenty to fight over in the rankings, and there may well be a few twists to unfold before the end of the season!

Game On!

Peds x

Wednesday, 16 September 2009

Darts – The Night of the Dart Juggler!

The nights are drawing in quite fast; sadly summer is over it seems, even at a quarter to eight as I kick started the hut ready for Bad Boy habitation the ambient light was fading fast. No problem, the hut perimeter lights are up to the job!

First on the scene (after P-resident Petro) was Monsignor Moth followed by Camp-Man, oops sorry I mean Camp-a-van -Man! Soon after; born again Bad Boy Freshwater-Fish-Steve arrived to make up the quorum.

Post flipometer the teams were Peter and Ian ‘v’ Casablanca Mike and Steve which I consider to be a reasonable flip.

The first leg went to Peds and Rushers as did the second and third, I hate to mention it but I must! One of those was a whitewash. Steve and CM fought back and took the fourth, missed the fifth but took the sixth, faded a little as Getitonbangagong and Ian took the seventh and eight games.

This left us with a score line of PI 123578 / W46 CMS. I would be the first to say that although I think Ian and I played the better darts on the night I don’t believe that a 6-2 victory accurately reflects the evening’s play, somewhere nearer to a draw would better reflect Mike and Steve’s performance.

Notable Events:

CM I believe (I think I may have been outside of the hut or distracted) scored a Bull / Semi combo to steal a game.

CM also had a few problems with dart fallout, for some reason tonight quite a few of his darts were not sticking. His first attempts to save the situation involved him skidding up the rubber mat to the board and making athletic grabs at the errant darts, some successful, some not. However his pièce de résistance was running up to the board and grabbing multiple darts as they fell out, he looked like somebody juggling darts!

I think Steve played some excellent darts and as has always been the case MOTM is not just awarded for the best darts of the night but to the player who exceeds their regular playing level on the evening, for me Steve deserves the award for tonight and I might also add that the MOTM chart shows Steve as top dog… It appears that he doesn’t turn up a lot but plays well when he does!

Bull Wars: Peter 2, Ian 2, CM 1. No Bullmeister tonight!

Chart Changes: Not a sausage! However the difference between CM and Ian now drops from last week’s 3.5% to less than 1.5% currently these two are a battle to watch! Doddy returns next week and Steve is his nearest rival, it would be interesting to get these two in the hut on opposite teams.

Game on!

Peter x

Tuesday, 8 September 2009

Darts – One of those nights!

I am going to try and keep the report short and sweet.

It was wet and horrible outside the hut tonight but we still managed to muster Pete, Ian, CM and Papa. After a quick practice and a couple of ‘flips’ the teams were: Pete and CM ‘v’ Ian and Papa.

We launched in to the games at a hectic pace managing to comfortably finish eight before 10pm.

Folk’s play throughout the evening was variable and folk’s opinions of their own play were variable and not always the same as other players would have rated them!

Over the evening a pattern started to emerge, bluntly the pattern was that Pete and CM were winning most games, however they had to generate a large lead to secure a win because when the games came to the closing stages both Papa and particularly Ian were belting home the bulls and semis. In many games without the cushion we would have been pipped at the post.

There wasn’t much to choose between the teams in the first few games but in the later contests PCM dominated making a final score line of: PCM 134678 / IPAPA 25

Notable Events:

For the first time ever I think I am posting a ‘scoreboard’ without the final game on, I think MC must have wiped the scores expecting to play a ninth, thankfully it still has the main details included!

Ian and CM had bull – semi finishes.

I think we all had double semi turns!

Quite a lot of trebles, shanghais, the odd rebound and drop out but absolutely no rubbers, hurrah!

Bull Wars: Ian 4, Papa 2, CM 2, Pedros 1.

Chart Changes: None, Pete and CM bunch closer together, only 0.12% between them. Ian and Papa both drop slightly but retain their relative positions. The other major battle going on is at the other end of the scoreboard between Doddy and Steve. I am hoping this will evolve over the next few weeks!

Game on!

Peter x

Tuesday, 1 September 2009

Darts – The Return Of The Prodigal Son!

I couldn’t help but feel there were some religious overtones to tonight’s darts gathering. Firstly in the morning I spoke to Papa who told me he was too far away to play tonight, which meant we had lost a bad boy in the wilderness. Then it rained and rained and rained, the water levels were rising and as I stood outside the hut this evening looking at its wooden majesty through even more tumultuous rain I couldn’t help but think it was perhaps a little like Noah’s Ark sat upon the top of the hill waiting to float away.

Next a pair of bad boys entered the ark; Doddy and Rushers. The three of us were just about to set sail to the land of Mickey Mouse when a miracle happened. Another person came scampering up the ladder and collapsed wet, exhausted and dartless. It was Steve, the prodigal son had returned after eleven weeks in the wilderness.

After some inevitable piss taking the teams were ready for action: Pete and Doddy ‘v’ Ian and Steve.

We set off at a fair lick and although the first few games were well contested Peds and the Doddmeister managed to crack off the first three bouts. Ian and Steve had definitely been getting the bit between their collective teeth and although they narrowly missed the third they were bang on for the fourth, they looked like taking the fifth but it went to the opposition.

Mothy and Pikey then took the sixth game and were looking favourites for the seventh but after their early lead Petronius and Mike took the honours.

This produced a final score line of: PD 12357 / 46 IS

Notable Events:

Doddy had a double Bull! Ian and Pete had double Semis. I think there was a bull + semi as well but can’t remember who it was, may even have been me.

There were several Shanghais, Both Ian and Steve had double trebles.

For the first time in a couple of years we found a game anomaly that requires a new ‘local rule’ to be declared. Either Pete or Doddy failed to put a line through a number after they knocked it off. Consequently Steve played for the number thinking it was still live, after a bit of discussion he re-threw the dart that he had thrown at the dead number.

I reckon this is the first time we have had this happen and it not be noticed before throwing, we have had folks fail to put a cross up before but it hasn’t really affected the game. To make sure that it can’t happen again please observe the following...

Local Rule: When checking the scoreboard before your turn take a look at the number of crosses on both sides of a number, if you see six crosses without a line through it is still off as both sides have scored three hits. It is the number of crosses that take precedence not the line.

Bull Wars: Doddy 3, Peter 2, Ian 1, Steve 1. This makes Doddy the bullmeister and after an excellent evening’s darts MOTM.

Chart Changes: Pete gains a half % putting him back in the top spot, which moves CM down to second. Ian drops just under 1% but stays in third place. Doddy jump up 2.5%! Steve drops around 2%, This means that Steve and Doddy swap places, The Doddmeister moving up to eighth place.

A top evening, a pleasure to see Steve in the hut again and that’s about it until next week!

Game On!

Peter x

Wednesday, 26 August 2009

Darts – The Power Struggle!

It was a lovely summers evening as I awaited the arrival of the bad boys who were playing tonight. First up was CM followed by John, then Doddy and close behind the Moth Killer. Well, when I say it was a lovely summers evening I mean outside of the hut of course, inside the hut it was slightly gloomy, why I hear you ask?

As is often traditional in these parts of Nailsworth we are regularly (but the first time during a darts fixture) treated to a power cut for no apparent reason. So when the lads arrived the hut was lit with night light candles much like Santa’s Grotto!

Obviously the dartboard needed proper illumination; this was taken care of (dimly but just about adequately) by lodging a torch in the rafters and aiming it at the board. We managed one and a half games like this before the power returned. Notably we ALL had to walk to the board to double check our scores before we were sure what we had got and (I at least) had to ask partners to tell me what was on the scoreboard!

Anyway, on to the darts proper from the start! We flipped and then peered in the candlelight to find that the first flip of the flipometers had chosen teams of Peter, Casablanca and the Doddmeister ‘v’ Mothston and Livingstone.

Rushers and Johnny boy wasted no time in pilling on the agony in the first round leaving us several bulls behind, however we nearly caught the buggers and in the end they only won by a semi. This was more often than not the way of the evening with many matches hard fought and down to the wire. That said Ian and John played better and deserved to win, John was particularly consistent and earned himself MOTM (second time in a row).

The final score line was IJ 1235 / 46 PCMD.

Notable Events: Playing in the friggin’ dark! Hats off to all the Bad Boys for just getting on with it despite the poor conditions.

Several folks had double treble scoring throws and I believe john and CM managed bull-semi turns and john a double semi.

Rushers splatted another moth, so the hut now has a second winged Turin Shroud.

Bull Wars: CM 2, Doddy 2, Peds 1.

Chart Changes: None, some gaps narrow, but not enough to make a move.

So it is still GAME ON!

Peter x

Wednesday, 12 August 2009

Darts – A Rum Tale?

Another exciting and entertaining evening was had at Bad Boys, the turns for the evening were Pete, Papa, John, Doddy and Wushers. One flip of the flipometers decided that Papa, Ian and John would challenge Doddy and Peter.

This seemed like a remarkably interesting pairing when you consider that Doddy and I represent both ends of the (active) player charts and that Ian, Papa and John are third, fourth and fifth respectively, what would happen with the evening’s honours?

Well I knew what I thought would happen; Doddy and I would get a sound thrashing! Don’t get me wrong, this wasn’t a slur by me on Doddy’s potential performance for the night. I had seen my own practice session and the results were grim! Anyway, we girded our loins and prepared for action.

Speaking of loins Papa has a very strange object as a key ring fob, it looks like some gruesome, grubby, decomposing testicle. However Papa insists that it is a well worn miniature rugby ball. Take a look for yourself if you get a chance, just ask Papa for a look at his funny shaped ball. I digress.

We cracked in to the first game and much to my amazement Mr D and I won it! We congratulated ourselves on avoiding a whitewash and moved on to the second game. This was duly taken by Papa and company. Doddy and I found ourselves having to celebrate again as we took the third game. Ian’s mob took the fourth game. By the end of the fifth game Mike and I were looking at each other in disbelief as we had bagged a third game. John’s team then took the sixth game; clearly they wanted all the even numbers! Then they got greedy and took an odd numbered game as well.

This left us with a final score line of PD 135 / 2467 PPIJ being a 4-3 victory to Papa, Ian and John.

I think it is fair to say that all the players had some very useless moments as well as flashes of absolute brilliance!

Notable Events:

Some criminal darts from Pete and Doddy, you would have thought we had been on the rum with some throws.

Several players had scoring Shang-hi’s

Several players had Bull-Semi finishes

John had a three semi turn, along with the previous items I think this probably entitles him to be MOTM.

Bull Wars: Doddy 4, John 2, Papa 1, Ian 1, Peter 1. Making Doddy this week’s Bullmeister.

Chart Changes: I am knocked off the top spot leaving CM back in first place. Ian and Papa improve their %’s very modestly. Doddy and John improve by half a %+. So, no massive shake-ups this week.


Peter x

Tuesday, 4 August 2009

Darts – Another Bad Boy First!

Greeting pop pickers, another gloriously exciting evening’s darts, along with a highly anticipated first (no not the triple bull!), but more of that later.

It was a horrible rainy evening but that didn’t stop the four assigned conquistadors arriving ready to do battle. Pedros had opened the base camp and was duly joined by Johnny Boy, Jelly Shirt, and The Rushers.

Jelly arm managed to add yet another jelly variation to His Jelly Arm, Jelly Brain franchise by turning up with a lump of jizz style jelly on his shirt. Gentlemen, we give you ‘Jelly Shirt!’

After a bit of Forest Green banter from JN and JS we broke out the flippers and in no time at all we had sides of Peter and Rushers ‘v’ John and Jizz Shirt.

Mr Jelly was daft enough to ask all assembled if they thought he had been hard done by for not getting a certificate last week for gross misconduct (or great darts as he still seems to believe they were). After he was given short shrift by all he thankfully settled down and was ready to play some darts.

The middle for diddle went to Pete and Ian, despite getting first crack the initial game went to John and Mike, the second and third went to Peds and the Moth Man.

Then something rather stunning happened. The next game was an absolute draw, I believe the first in Bad Boy history, we have been close before but this was the real thing. Both sides had a score of 222 points, (John and Mike had been behind on score but had caught up on bulls while Ian and I were trying to finish our required three crosses). This meant that we couldn’t score and the best we could do was force a draw before J&M could win by hitting a scoring semi. We were lucky enough to get one in forcing the game to be discounted from the evening’s tally. Ian and Peds went on to take the next two games making the evening’s score line: JJS 1X / 23X45 PI, being a 4 – 1 victory to PI

It has to be said that John and Mike were very unlucky not to claim the drawn game and one or two others, again this week most games were hotly contended and came down to bulls.

Notable events:

The aforementioned Draw!

The aforementioned Shirt!

Both Pete and Mike had Bull semi turns.

There were several high scoring shanghai’s

Bull Wars: JS 3, Pete 2, John 1 making Jelly Shirt the Bullmeister!

Chart Changes: Peter takes pole position for the first time this year, forcing CM down to second place, we are incredibly close though, only %0.08 in it. Jelly shirt goes back down a spot and John moves up one; reversing their recent swap. These two are even closer with a minute gap of %0.06!

So it is definitely Game On!

Peter X

Wednesday, 29 July 2009

Darts – Jelly Arm goes Jelly Brained!

Greetings Bad Boys and Darts Enthusiasts! It was a four handed game this evening, on the starting blocks were Pete, John, Papa and Jelly Arm. We all had a bit of practice and then let fly the flipometers; they immediately chose Pete and Mike-D ‘V’ Stanley and Papa.

We proceeded to work our way through eight games and by god they were close games! Six of the eight games came down to one semi to win finishes, another had twenty-eight points in it, the first game was the only one with a decent margin, so very hard fought and exciting bouts.

Jelly Arm and Peter were quick off the mark and managed to take three games on the trot and were beginning to eye up a big score for the evening (although in truth we knew it was probably only a matter of time before it became a game of two halves; as they say). Papa and John broke our winning streak by taking the fourth, luckily we then scrabbled back to the top of the pile for the fifth, after that the honours were taken in turns, giving a final score line of PMD 12357 / JP 468 securing Pete and Jelly Arm a 5 – 3 victory.

As you can see it could easily have gone either way, but JA and I just managed to keep our noses in front enough to claim a couple of extra games, mind you we were made to work hard for it!

Notable Events:

Papa had a bull-semi finish

Jelly Arm went Jelly Brained on 11’s and 14’s - Absolutely bizarre, the 14’s were dead Papa and John were holding three elevens, we had two and it was JA’s turn. He stepped up to the oche and planted his first dart in the treble eleven. Mere mortals would have felt it was time to move on particularly as we were trailing a little, but not Jelly Brain, he planted his second dart in the treble eleven, not satisfied with this he then pierced the treble with his third arrow! Having bagged nine elevens, (eight of which were worth fuck all to us) the cheeky bugger asked me if he would be getting a certificate for his efforts, with much pleasure I had to decline!

Well, that moment of madness apart I have to say it was a real pleasure to partner JB for the evening, he played some excellent darts with only a couple of self-talking-to’s.

Bull Wars: Papa 3, Peter 3, John 2, JB 2. No bullmeister tonight, but a five a side tally!

Chart Changes: Mike-D gained a hefty 2.5% which moves him up to fifth position swapping places with John. Both Papa and John lose about 0.8% on the night while Peter increases by a minute 0.3% leaving him around half a % behind CM.

Anyone who hasn’t let me have August AND September dates yet please let me know ASAP, Cheers....

Game On!

Peter x

Tuesday, 21 July 2009

Darts – Sometimes nothing goes right.

After a heavy days rain the clouds finally lifted and we had what passes for a summer’s evening. Bang on eight Doddy and Ian arrived closely followed by Casablanca Mike. After a couple of flips the teams were decided as Pete and CM ‘v’ Ian and Doddy.

We launched in to a seven game evening which it has to be said was very one sided. Ian and Doddy only managed to get in to their stride a couple of times and when they did it was too late to capitalise on, consequently the final score line was ID W/1234567 PCM.

As much as CM and I were happy to get the games under our belt we certainly had sympathy for Ian and Mike, we have all been on the receiving end of a thrashing and it can be very frustrating. Undoubtedly though the tables will be turned another week!

Notable events:

Doddy had a spectacular turn: Dart one in the semi, dart two in the rubber, dart three in the semi! I think that has to be a first.

I believe Ian, CM and Pete all had a bull semi turn and CM also had another three semi turn.

Bull Wars: Ian 2, CM 2, Peter 2 so no bullmeister this week.

Chart Changes: CM and Pete move up one place each to first and second respectively which pushes Ian in to third place.

One evening still has the ability to make significant changes to the leader board so there is still plenty of time for things to change before the season is over, so it is definitely...

Game on!

Peter x

Tuesday, 14 July 2009

Darts – Tickets Please! ALL CHANGE, ALL CHANGE!

I opened up the Bad Boys station just before eight to be ready for the passengers arriving to take a trip on the darts express. First on the platform was Casablanca Mike, followed by John and Ian. We made ourselves comfortable in the first class carriage and just before the darts express pulled out Papa bounded up the escalator and leapt aboard. Toot Toot! We were on our way.

We flipped our tickets to see what the seating arrangements were and they turned out to be Pete, Ian and CM on one side of the carriage and Papa and John on the other.

There were eight stops on the journey, by the time we reached the first station Papa and John had steamed ahead with a score of over three hundred points leaving them in the first class carriage and the rest of us travelling in the cheap seats. Mind you we deserved it as we played miserably. We did improve though and kicked john and Papa out of first class at the second station and didn’t let them back in until the seventh stop, however they were shunted back to cattle class by the time we reached our final destination.

This gave us a final score line of JP 17 / PICM 234568 putting us on track for a 6 – 2 win at Victoria Station.

Notable Events:

Generally Players were either rubbish or spot on. I reckon we all had spells of both, thankfully the rubbish periods didn’t last too long, however this means there was no MOTM.

Ian managed a treble semi turn and was soon followed in another game by John taking a bull and two semis, he then followed it up the next turn with a bull and semi, damn fine darts in anyone’s books.

Papa had a bit of trouble with darts falling out. On one turn as he went to take them out of the board one fell to the ground, as he began picking it up another fell and nearly skewered him, then as he picked up the second the third fell out! I think he might have got a flesh wound from that one. It appears the new dartboard likes sharp darts; please feel free to make use of the dart sharpener in the hut if you start suffering from dropsy!

Bull Wars: A reasonable haul tonight. John 3, CM 3, Ian 2, Peter 1.

Chart Changes:

Papa’s season ticket at the head of the queue has expired! He is currently residing in carriage number four. Ian, CM and Pete having dined extensively in the buffer car for the evening all made their way up one position to first, second and third places respectively. John stayed put despite taking a 2% hit.

A quick look at the %’s will show you there is plenty of scope for more changes for all passengers so it is definitely GAME ON!

Peter x

August Dates Please Gents!

Hi Folks

Please let me have your August dates.

I expect there will be plenty of you away on holiday so if you can be as flexible as possible on the dates you can attend it would be appreciated. I will try to make sure no fixtures are cancelled.



Tuesday, 7 July 2009

Darts: The Struggle To Win!

I don’t know if it was the weather, the alignment of planets or the onset of swine fever but when the Bad Boys gathered for the evening’s match everyone seemed very laid back, almost horizontal. We all fancied a win but I am not sure anyone was ‘driven’.

Anyway, after Pete, John , Doddy and Rushers climbed the steps to the hallowed hut, we stood around to shoot the breeze for a bit then we decided to meander inside and flip the flippers for teams. Eventually the flipping resulted in Rushers and Stan ‘v’ Pete and the Doddmeister.

We surveyed the new equipment (courtesy of the chalk warriors), a new ‘Bulls - Premium - Advantage II’ Dartboard with extra thin wires / dividers, A spanking new old school blackboard rubber and a couple of chalk trays (left and right) for easier chalking. I liked the board a lot (but not all were as enamoured on first use), I think we need to reserve judgment on it until everyone has had a few games. The rest of the kit however seemed to be widely approved.

The games were started in earnest and IJ took the first honours comfortably. Pete and Doddy were clearly concerned enough to take the second and third games, however Ian and John were not going to let us have it all our own way and took the fourth. PD rose again to take the fifth but could not manage the sixth which went to Ian and John. This produced a 3 - 3 draw with the final score line being IJ 146 / 235 PD. You can tell how laid back it was, we only managed six games!

Notable Events:

John re-enacted one of JA’s most notorious crimes by wandering off in to the garden to organise a cricket match on his mobile while the rest of us contemplated the points of our darts. Bloody cricketers, he nearly got nine darts in his back.

On a more positive note (cricket arrangements out of the way) John managed to gain his second three semis in a turn – well done sir!

Generally we all played some very lax darts but there were flashes of brilliance with some heavy treble scoring, particularly from Pete and Doddy although these were mostly negated later in the games when Ian and John were trebling as well or piling semis and bulls on to the score sheet to erode any leads.

Oh and Doddy wore a very fetching pink blouse, I must say it was super crisp and immaculately presented, we all agreed he looked gorgeous in it (that’s how good it was, honest).

Bull Wars: Peter 3, John 3 and Ian 2 (nearly all of these were scored in the second half of the evening).

Chart Changes: Not a sausage! Zilch, Nada, SFA, BA, Nuffin’, Nowt.... All players except Doddy were dragged down marginally by the result. Mr Pink however bagged himself just over a 1% rise, good effort Doddy and well played.

This means that Papa is still top of the table but still has Ian snapping at his heals, mere mortals lower down the table await one or both the dynamic duo to have a bad result and throw us some crumbs to feed on.

Game On!

Peter x

Tuesday, 30 June 2009

Darts - Fashionistas, Papa is all the rage!

It was a hot night in the hut. I put the fan on full blast a couple of hours before the match started but the temperature would not budge below 22c. As the evening went on it got hotter 25c+ But I am getting ahead of myself!

The Bad Boys present were (as usual in order of arrival) Peter (resident so always first it has to be said!), Casablanca, Mickey D, the Rushmeister and Papa.

We took a few minutes for practice, greetings and general banter before resorting to the flipometers who declared on the first toss that I was Bily no mates, however the second toss teamed me up with Mike-D (J.A.) and Papa... Leaving Rushers and Casablanca as the default opposition.

The defaulters wasted no time in taking the first game. BUT We weren’t going to let that hold us back so we immediately responded by taking the second. BUT the defaulters weren’t going to let that hold them back so they immediately took the third game. BUT we weren’t going to let that hold us back so we immediately took the fourth game..... Then the story changes somewhat. Starting off nicely with PMDP taking the fifth, but sadly that was to be our last and ICM (In-Continent Missile) drubbed us by taking sixth, seventh and eight.

Our only consolation was that it wasn’t an easy victory, but I have to say that both Ian and CM played more consistently and deserved to win, the bastards. This meant the final score line was ICM 13678 / PMDP 245 a 5 -3 victory to ICM.

Notable Events:

JA and Papa both had double semi turns, Papa’s would have been a treble semis but he suffered a bounce out.

Ian and Casablanca both managed a bull semi turn. JA managed a six of something on the left.... 11 or 14 I believe, whichever it was he bloody enjoyed it!

MOST NOTABLE of all.... Was that everyone (and I mean everyone) was pretending to be Papa and ignoring team orders, so much so I think they should have been called team disorders!

Bull Wars: In short supply tonight but the results were, Ian 2, CM 1.

Chart changes: Casablanca Mike pips Pete at the post and moves up to third position.

Top evening, highly competitive and more to come next week!

Game On

Peter x